How Do I... ?

I'm writing because I truthfully want to know where to begin. And I have no idea how to start.

We all know that the shooting that happened in Orlando over the weekend was devastating, and the circumstances around the events open a new conversation about love, acceptance, inclusiveness, diversity, and community. 

I was asked to weigh in on this and share some of my opinions by someone. I didn't immediately welcome the conversation. Before you tell me I am wrong for taking my time to reply, I need your advice. 

I am 25 years old. I am white. I am female. I am heterosexual. I am cisgender. While I don't consider myself to identify strongly with religion, I have roots in Christianity. How in the world am I supposed to have a productive conversation about diversity? 

I know that I want to accept people for who they are and want nothing less than to judge a person based on the things I listed above about myself. But I also have not faced the same trials and fears and stressors that some of my friends have. I don't know what it is like to be categorized and stereotyped beyond a little White Girl that gets way too excited about Pumpkin Spice Lattes and designer jeans.

Have you ever done a privilege walk? I've done a few. You get asked a bunch of questions as a group and you half to walk forward or backward (individually) depending on your answer. "If you grew up with books in your house, take a step forward." "If you ever had to skip a meal because you didn't have food in the house, take a step backward." ... I don't even have words for how that felt. There is nothing that hurts more than a visual divide between you and your friends. I cried so hard I wanted to throw up. I'm not saying this to be an asshole. It's actually the opposite. I want to have these conversations. But what stops me, is the fact that I don't have that firsthand understanding of being discriminated against for my race, ethnicity, religion, gender identity, sexual orientation, or other surface-level identifier. I don't know if I feel qualified to say, "I understand." because I probably don't. 

I can have a conversation about acceptance. I can talk about focusing on who people are as humans, and that every person is entitled to equal human rights and I can tell you that I do not care what gender identity or sexual orientation the person peeing in the bathroom stall next to me has. I can tell you that my friends have different religious, ethnic, and racial backgrounds. My friends have different levels of education. My friends are not all heterosexual or cisgendered individuals. And I can also tell you that every single one of them is deserving of love and life, and a safe place to work, live, use the restroom, dance at a club, walk down the street, sit at a table, ride a bus, visit a convenience store, go to school and live their lives without anyone rubbing their noses in their business or pointing a weapon at them. I can tell you that kindness wins hearts, smiles go a long way, manners are worth using, and being nice matters. I want is to be able to stop seeing people feel like they have to hide who they are for fear of violence against them.

I want to positively contribute to that conversation and help others feel safe, and while I can not speak on behalf of others, and in this conversation that would be those individuals who don't feel that it's okay to be who they are in public, I can proudly voice that my goals align with theirs, and that I want everyone to be able to feel safe in a club, at work, in their neighborhood, and anywhere they go - regardless of any of the surface-level factors that people often [wrongly] use to separate others. I don't know a thing about what it feels like to be on the receiving end of many types of discrimination, but this is not something that should be limited to a certain community - it should be open to every community. I am able to voice what I've witnessed, whether I felt if it were right or wrong (and why), and if I admit that I don't know everything, and am willing to learn and research, I am opening myself up to more possibilities. I am going out on a limb and hoping this is a good place to start.